Do Not Click Do Not Click Do Not Click
Clarence
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By Andrew Osborne

“Calvin?” asked the officer who sat down in front of him.
“Yes?” Calvin replied gloomily, staring at the officer’s name-tag. “Clarence” it read.
“I’m here to tell you that we caught the man,” Clarence stated.
“You did?” asked Calvin in disbelief.
“Indeed,” Clarence replied, smoothing out his black suit.
“Who was it?”
“A man, about the age of thirty-two,” answered Clarence, combing his light-brown hair to the side of his face with his hand, so that it wouldn’t be in his peripheral vision. “He has medium length dirty blonde hair,” Clarence adjusted his glasses that sat in front of his brown eyes imprinted in his pale face. “He is white with hazel eyes; and he doesn’t see well without his glasses,” Clarence had a scraggly beard that sat upon his chin, but no mustache. “He has a scrawny beard all across his chin, but apparently he dislikes mustaches, because he always shaves his off,” Clarence had a thick European accent, possibly Scottish, but at the same time, possibly British. “He and his family moved from Great Britain to America when he was just a lad, though we’re not sure which part of Great Britain he is from,” Calvin didn’t see him when he was standing up, but he seemed shorter than everyone based on the people who were also sitting down. “He is about five-one, pretty teeny for someone his age”.
“Do you know why he committed the crime?” Calvin asked abruptly. Clarence shrugged his shoulders
“Unfortunately, no, we don’t exactly know why he did it; in fact we don’t think he even knows. He doesn’t appear to feel too guilty about what he did, it’s like he doesn’t have a conscience, or that it’s so deprived of innocence that it left him, and that it’s just now coming back to him. We do, however, have a theory. We theorize that because of how stressful his job is, and the frustrating situations at home, he felt a sudden need to vent his anger out on someone, and tragically that person was your wife,” Clarence explained. Calvin rubbed his temples.
“There’s only one thing I don’t understand. Not once have I seen anybody like who you described in this town before, save for you, but you’re an officer, and you wouldn’t be telling me this if you had done it” Calvin stared straight into Clarence's eyes. Clarence smirked.
“My good fellow Calvin, have you looked in the mirror lately?”



Brian Falkner Books